I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
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