You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
