Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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