We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
