My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
