I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
