so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Drunk is not a location!
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
