Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
