i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
