We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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