Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
