this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
