Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
