Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
