Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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