there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
