just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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