This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
