we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
