I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
