You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
