he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
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