I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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