just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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