I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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