Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
