we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
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