It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Randomize
