I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
