i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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