She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
