sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
