How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
