Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
