Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i just google imaged poop.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
ugly people sure do ruin things
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
third nipple confirmed
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
