I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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