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My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I'm always down for nudity.
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