i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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