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i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
third nipple confirmed
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
