yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
