It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
