He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
