Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
