i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
