And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize
