So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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