is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
