What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
