Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
