Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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